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Anyone who has struggled to become pregnant knows that infertility is an inherently stressful, demoralizing experience. The longer it goes on, the more intensive the medical interventions, the more physically, psychologically, and financially intrusive the experience becomes for an individual or a couple. Infertility can be a “crazy making” world—but it doesn’t have to be…. A recent internet news article on VICE highlights the toll fertility treatments can take on mental health and the important role of fertility counseling, with specially trained mental health professionals, is in dealing with the emotional challenges. Olivia Campbell interviewed me for this article that discussed how routine aspects of fertility treatment can be anything but routine for patients going through it. Multiple losses and [...]

Times of stress affect many aspects of life and may negatively impact those closest to you. It is sometimes easier to conserve emotional energy by withdrawing than to reach out to a partner. During a challenge to fertility, this can lead to feeling alone and unsupported, perhaps even for the first time in a previously harmonious relationship.  Emotions run deep and can be overwhelming to an individual, let alone a couple. Preexisting patterns may no longer be effective facing this new challenge. We often want to share all our ups and downs with those nearest and dearest, so rather than fending for yourself, try going on offense as a couple.   How do you know what your partner really needs [...]

I have come to truly appreciate the word AND.  It is so little, but it could be the most powerful word in our language.  It is a word that gives us permission to experience multiple feelings at the same time. It is a word that allows us to be human. Why do we often force ourselves into one emotion? And even when we allow ourselves to have multiple emotions, why do we assume they all  have to be the same stripe. “I am sad for myself AND happy for you” says the mother whose daughter was moving away.  “I love it here AND I am homesick” says the 18 year old away at college for the first time.  “I am [...]